The Woolen Heart

A black bench in front of traffic. Hands on cement, feet on grass, questions.

"Grandma I don't understand why things happen the way they do. Mom always seems angry, dad always seems sad. The kids at school bother Eddie and me. I just don't get it. Most of the t.v. shows are about problems. Father Malcolm says that God is love, but I've read that he'll only love me if I do things his way. If something is right, shouldn't it be easy to do? I just don't get this whole life thing grandma, I really don't."

"Every moment has a foundation child. People forget that. Your mom is sad. Your dad is angry. They are acting like each other to try to understand. The kids at school are lonely and they see that you are full of light - weakness is provocative (by that I mean appealing); that's because people are afraid of what they think they can never harness...Those kids just want comfort and you'll never give it to them because you don't have to. Of course they don't like you, some day they will love you though. Most t.v. shows give people what they crave, and that love, is fear - fear is easy. Father Malcolm knows his God, just like someday you'll know yours. Don't read about God, just feel God. Nothing should ever be easy or hard, things are as you see them. The right thing, is the right thing, because you know it is. You just know."

"And this whole life thing Grandma, what is it?"

"Life is an outfit you knit and pearl. Sometimes you patch it up and sometimes you roll it back into the ball you need it to be. Life is always what you create, because that is what you are, a creator."

"So this is all my fault!"

"No, this is what you need to happen."

-an excerpt from a ci ci anomaly.

claro clarie.